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Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Croc Wearing Douchebag*

So I got Crocs the over the weekend.

These things:

Yes I see that my dog is embarrassed of me.

And I am aware there's alot wrong with Crocs. Kids can wear Crocs and it's no problem. Fun. Girls can wear Crocs and look cute. But dudes in crocs look like... douche bags. I realize this. Dude comes clomping down the street in bright green Crocs and all non-croc wearers who see him gets a thought-bubble over their head. 90% of those bubbles say, 'Douche alert!!' (or some douche variation). I get it. I know.

There's something about Croc wearers that seems arrogant. Like they're willing to walk around the street and blatantly annoy everyone with their ugly footwear. They got a certain pride too. Like football players who run 90 yards in the wrong direction and think they've scored a touchdown.

But the other day I was in a store (wearing backbreaking flat flipflops) and I saw Crocs and I asked the chick behind the counter about em. She said she loves them. I asked her if they had it in size 13. She said they had em in Black, Green, and Orange. I asked for black. I was stunned that they had 13s.

I noticed what she brought out weren't 'Crocs' but some brand called 'Holey Soles' so not sure if they're a cheap knockoff or what but whatever. They were awesome immediately. Probably the most comfortable summery shoes I've ever worn. They got some archness in them and a good mushy support and I'm onboard with these friggin things. Done and done. Sorry.

So yes, I am now one of those clompy douchebags walking around on the street. (Hey they're not orange or anything!). And yes, there might be a sense of pride to me wearing them because I'm sort of psyched that I'm willing to walk down the street looking like a douche for the benefit of my own friggin comfort. I've been thru flipflops, birks, tevas, all sorts of crap and these things are the bestest so far. So F all you hatahs! Gotta keep it real! I love these crocs!

And yes, I'm aware this is the type of douchey post you would expect from a douchey Croc wearer...

ok bye!

*PS. Apologies to all croc wearers for calling us douches. I know I'm late to the game with these things and I'm not even cool enough to be a croc douche properly. Didn't mean to sound like some kind of jerk in this post even though I done did.


Anonymous Adamant said...

Crocs are gay. End of story. Sorry bro.

August 8, 2007 1:55 PM  
Blogger Tina said...

Comfort over fashion = integrity.
Integrity = sexy. End of story.

August 8, 2007 2:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


August 8, 2007 2:04 PM  
Blogger DeeJay said...

Hey, you like what you like. Everybody else can get over it and shut up.

Looks like Tina's trying to tell you something.

August 8, 2007 2:08 PM  
Anonymous Allie C said...

Todd, you can do better than using the word "douchebag". You are a better writer than that.

August 8, 2007 2:13 PM  
Anonymous Talula0658 said...

I'm much happier knowing they aren't orange or something.

August 8, 2007 2:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holey Soles are a product of Canada! I call double douche!

August 8, 2007 2:14 PM  
Blogger wheresmymind said...

I don't care how comfy they may be...they make your feet look like F*ing Frankenstien. You've been talkin' about buying these for a kudos for following through on something you wanted to do!

August 8, 2007 2:22 PM  
Blogger karmacomedian said...

Hey was the "Todd" in the new adv of old elaine wearing crocs too?

August 8, 2007 2:26 PM  
Anonymous weeze said...


August 8, 2007 2:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, here in Gainesville EVERYONE's wearing Orange Crocs!

August 8, 2007 3:11 PM  
Anonymous Abbie said...

orange crocs are cooler than black dude

August 8, 2007 3:27 PM  
Anonymous stalker said...

August 8, 2007 3:32 PM  
Blogger Tamsen said...

Not for me, but I've heard they're comfy. I've never even tried one on, and never will ever buy a pair(knock on wood).

I honestly don't think croc wearers are douche bags... so there ya go. I think the brighter the croc, the uglier, but you see 'em everywhere these days, I think I've started to ignore them.

August 8, 2007 3:40 PM  
Blogger MD said...

You'd fit right in down here in VA Beach... people are too uptight up north...wear your crocs and feel good about it!

August 8, 2007 3:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In DC I have a colleague who loves his ORANGE CROCS! They are all over the place around here. I haven't bought a pair yet, but I did try them on and was very tempted!

Way to go Todd! Crocs - the new Birks!

August 8, 2007 3:45 PM  
Anonymous Eggman said...

Crocs are SOOOO last year, douche.

August 8, 2007 3:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a croc douche too. Comfort over fashion, true that, especially when it comes to feet.

August 8, 2007 4:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

who cares....

August 8, 2007 4:28 PM  
Blogger jlechwar said...

Screw 'em, OT. If you're comfy, that's all that matters. Who the hell cares what they look like? Only how they feel. Roscoe isn't embarrassed...he's wants to chew 'em on up. Rock on!

August 8, 2007 4:35 PM  
Anonymous CSue said...

"Like football players who run 90 yards in the wrong direction and think they've scored a touchdown."

Spot-on analogy.

Just don't start putting Jibbitz on your faux crocs.

August 8, 2007 4:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ummmm.... you spent a month on the west coast, and those legs look white enough to blind a person to prevent them from even seeing the shoes!!!!

August 8, 2007 4:48 PM  
Blogger Odd tOdd said...

I can't go to the beach due to body issues and boredom issues! Sorry croc people if I sound like a dope in this post...

August 8, 2007 5:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They are definitely ugly ugly - but if you like the feel - screw everyone else they're your feets do 'em up how ya like.

Like when are ya going to enter a fashion show anyway ?

Only losers whine about someone elses shoes !

August 8, 2007 5:10 PM  
Anonymous AudioAddict said...

Sooo gay Todd. See previous blog about your Todd being wrongly used. Well you just proved them all right. I bet if you didn't go out to L.A. you would be kickin' your own azz for wearing those.

August 8, 2007 5:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You love 'em NOW but just wait 'til the rain and snow hit those holes. Waddaya gonna do, buy galoshes for your Crocs???
~Al the Cat~

August 8, 2007 5:28 PM  
Anonymous todd spy said...

Make mep and elf up jibbitz! Id buy that!

August 8, 2007 5:35 PM  
Anonymous GQflyboy said...

Yes, they might be a fashion disaster, but like mentioned earlier, we have them everywhere in VA beach area.

It's kind of like the Quizno's Subs commercial that played during the super bowl. It was so obnoxious that people took notice.

I think the word for that is "campy" More power to ya Todd

August 8, 2007 5:36 PM  
Anonymous Csue said...

It's interesting how passionate people are about crocs - either for or against:

I actually like yours, Todd, much better than Batali's orange ones:

August 8, 2007 5:41 PM  
Blogger Tina said...

Al the Cat, silly, when it rains or snows, tOdd will just slip on his Crocs All Terrains!

August 8, 2007 5:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love my crocs! Wear them with pride, and laugh 'cause they're ugly.

Oh well... My feet feel niiiice!

August 8, 2007 6:42 PM  
Blogger lovechild said...

Hey Todd,
Kudos for doing what you gotta do on the Crocs issue. I mos def respect comfort over fashion=integrity.
One thing I thought when you first posted the topic:
"What about Vans?"
They slip on, have good arch support and have a rock and roll vibe.
Just a thought.
Croc On!

August 8, 2007 6:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Roc on with your crocs tOdd! I bought my first pair a few years ago, I live on a lake and they are perfect for walking in the water. I never thought I would wear them in public (I'm a girl, and a definate fashionista) but now I do, just to run around, walk the dog, etc. I no longer care what they look like! Too comfortable for words!
I now see those storms last night involved a tornado in Brooklyn this morning -- hope your neighborhood is ok!

August 8, 2007 7:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dude, those aren't crocs. They are croc knocs. booo. Anyways, I've got real crocs cuz I'm a nurse and we get to wear ugly shoes and pajamas to work basically. It rocks. Comfy! however, I must say I feel like a douche when I wear them out in public ( I always hated em ) but at least my feet don't hurt!

August 8, 2007 9:05 PM  
Anonymous ME! said...

Crocs may look silly but they are freakin comfortable! I work at a day care and we cant wear open toed shoes so thats what everyone wears. Plus crocs now come in different styles. Look them up!! Some look pretty cool.

August 8, 2007 9:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In a way, Crocs & Paris Hilton have a lot in common: both are plastic-y and make unreasonable amounts of money; people are obsessed with them (or rather obsessed with talking about them); & no one can really figure out why.

August 8, 2007 10:18 PM  
Anonymous Kat said...

tOdd I heard there was a tornado tonight in brooklyn! hope everything is OK! also not to be morbid but it might be cool if you would take some photos! Ive never heard of a tornado in such an urban area

August 8, 2007 10:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

pooooooooooor roscoe he spends a month away from you & then you wear those ugly assed things on your feet im sorry even my gay friends wont wear them lol

August 8, 2007 11:12 PM  
Blogger Tina said...

Yeah, tOdd, what's up with the tornado action in Brooklyn? You okay? Roscoe too? Any uprooted trees and cars on lawns or anything in your neck of the woods?

August 9, 2007 12:22 AM  
Blogger Odd tOdd said...

This post has been removed by the author.

August 9, 2007 9:23 AM  
Blogger Odd tOdd said...

Yah tis was far away but weird. I did wake up for the storm and watched it out the window tho...

August 9, 2007 9:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Crocs rule!!!!! I live on the coast of south carolina. They are perfect for fishing in the creek. Step in the mud and by the time you pull your foot out they are clean. Plus they have great traction for the boat they dont let me slip around like when my rainbows get wet.

August 9, 2007 9:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know what's comfortable?

Pyjamas! But you don't see me wearing that in the street.

I think that dressing well is a sign of respect, not only for yourself, but for the people around you.

Being well dressed sends a message to the people around you that when you go out. You dress well out of respect for them, because they deserve it. And you should expect the same from them in return.

Otherwise, you just end up with a society of slobs wearing pyjamas, crocs and (stained)nascar t-shirts. And I don't enjoy that.

Respect yourself, respect others.

Lose the crocs!!

August 9, 2007 12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, not even a real Croc but a knock off. Croc's are made here in Colorado but I wouldn't wear them or a knock off. Chaco's, now those are a real man's "summery" shoe. You can hike in them, they are comfortable, supportive and they look good. Also a Colorado product but a more serious shoe.

August 9, 2007 1:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ever hear of sneakers????

August 9, 2007 2:02 PM  
Anonymous todd spy said...

The only diff that I find between Holey Soles and Cros (if we are talknig about the original mould) is the rivets and the positioning of the holes on the top of the shoes. Otherwise they are identical in quality.

August 9, 2007 4:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

todd.... why???

August 9, 2007 7:00 PM  
Blogger ~ jen ~ said...

Perhaps Roscoe is embarrassed FOR you, as well. They look totally UNcomfortable. I'd ditch 'em and invest in some Merrels.

August 9, 2007 7:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i can't believe people are so rude. don't listen to other people tell you what to like or wear. If your feet are happy, you're totally happy, right. i don't dress for others. i own 2 pairs of the knock offs. never thought i would til i wore them. now, can't get them off my feet. oh what these other people are missing out on. you are no douchebag!

August 9, 2007 7:46 PM  
Anonymous Beth Slums said...

i think they are effing tacky. but if you like them rock the hell out of them.

August 9, 2007 11:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Look how comfy your grandpa looks wereing his wife beater tucked into shorts pulled over his belling and his white socks to the knees with black leather shoes. Wow he looks comfortable. DO you really want to be single forever todd. Make an effort. Go to the gym and dress nice. You have to make an effort.

August 10, 2007 10:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

todd may look like crap but at least he knows how to spell...its 'wearing' and 'belly' not "wereing and belling".....jackass.

August 10, 2007 2:57 PM  
Blogger Shan said...

Super duper dorky tOdd....Lose the crocs.

August 13, 2007 7:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What would make you a real DB (douche bag) would be if you put those pretty pins in your Holeys.

August 15, 2007 10:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What would make you a real DB (douche bag) would be if you put those pretty pins in your Holeys.

August 15, 2007 10:40 PM  
Anonymous fredv said...

...then you're a douchebag, so what? You REALLY could do worse than Crocs IMO.

August 30, 2007 6:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holey Soles is one of the worst Canadian Companies. They have terrible employment practices. Joyce Groote is one of the worst woman entrepreneurs in the 21st century. To those of you who are reading this please be cautions and be sensible before buying the clogs. There are alternatives companies like crocs from who you can purchase the same types of shoes. Crocs have better selection and have good employment practices. There will be more things posted about holey soles in the near future and more will be said about its atrocious employment practices. Those of you who want to join me in this campaign to take down such a horrible company that claims to be Canadian please do so by checking for a blog in the near future. Maybe Joyce Groote deserves another pie in the face.

January 1, 2008 10:00 PM  
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