Double Whammy Corporate Style

Hey Ya'll-

So I've been in the communications dark for a bunch of of days and it hasn't made me too crazy. VERIZON and TIME WARNER CABLE both kinda of screwed me over. But TIME WARNER CABLE sucks more. Here's what happened. So I called TWC to transfer my cable and internet connection and to have it turned on in my new place in Brooklyn. They told me they would have to give me a new cable box and cable modem because you can't transfer them between zones. They said they would send someone out to pick up the boxes on Monday and the cable would be hooked up on Tuesday in Brooklyn. I was very proud of myself for being responsible. Meanwhile I'm in the middle of moving out of Manhattan and the guy never comes to pick up the boxes and I call them up and they keep telling me he is on the way. Finally I'm like 'I AM MOVING NOW!' I can't be like hanging out here all day. I'll bring the boxes to Brooklyn and you can pick them up there. (Are you bored yet? If so just go download the Song for Thursday or sumthing). So here's what happened next.

I call up TWC when I get to Brooklyn to find out that both appointments were scheduled not for this week but for next week and that they can't get someone out here till Friday to hook up my internet connection. I'm like FRIDAY? You guys screwed up! Can you prioritize this? No. Can you do anything for me? No. Meanwhile their slogan is 'We're committed to being the best.'. Anyway then the lady asks me if I'd like to keep my old email address. I'm like 'Umm. what? Umm. Yes!' She's like well that email account has been shut off and no email is going thru. I'm like that's nice to know. Can you turn it back on? She's like No. I'm like can you prevent the emails from bouncing? No. Can you make sure I can have that email address when I do get my service hooked up? No. Time Warner can't make sure I'll have that email address that I've had for a year or so? No. But we can give you a brand new one. Great.

I told them on the phone that I am on my knees begging begging begging for them to preserve the email address and get someone out here to hook up my internet connection. Please I beg of you I said. Acting completely desperate. Sorry. Some customer service. 'We're committed to being the best' is their slogan. The best at what? Making me a lunatic? OK you're the best.

VERIZON

They told me my phone would be hooked up on Tuesday but I had no dial tone. I'm no tech expert but I think you need a dial tone. I called them up and they said they'll have to send someone out. I was like, Do I have to be here? They were like No, we can fix this from the outside. I go out that day and when I come back I have no dial tone. I call them up and they told me how they sent someone out but no one was here to let them in. I was like you guys told me I didn't have to be here. They were like, oh.. oops. I was like when can you send someone next? They were like tomorrow 8AM-6PM. So I get to be punished prisoner in my apartment all day cause they told me wrong before.

Believe me I understand what it's like to be a customer service rep (I used to be one for Gannett Newspapers in Westchester). But I also know that if when I was a rep if I really pushed things I could get someone a new newspaper if theirs got wet or something. I could make things happen by pushing it. I'd have to really work to do it but I could do it. Nobody cared enough at Time Warner to really WORK to make a desperate person a happy customer after THEY made a mistake. If the CEO was having a problem they could find someone to fix it within an hour i'm sure.

All in all it's been a miserable experience but the worst part was what I brought on myself in the actual moving of all my stuff with the movers and the whole deal. I won't bore you with that now. I'm gonna throw it all in a new cartoon which I'll try to finish asap and all that.

Sorry to bore you with my whiny rant about surprise surprise how big companies suck but that sucked.

Hope you're all doing well and all that. The Today Show thing is now scheduled for this Wednesday if you wanna watch..

-tOdd

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