Jerk Thief From Years Ago
So the other night I was out at a bar and I stupidly left my bag behind. I remembered as I was heading to the subway I was like, 'Hmm. How can I keep myself entertained on the subway?' And it hit me that my bag was sitting on the floor at the bar! I ran back there thinking my iPod is in there! My phone! My book! My keys! And tons of little knicknack paddywacks like my Leatherman pocket thing. (Yes I'm like a friggin girl with a pocketbook). I freaked. Luckily when I got back it was still sitting right there-- but it reminded me of a story from a few years back.
I was working at bn.com and I went out with some people after work. It was a pretty crowded place and everyone sort of threw their bags or whatever in this one pile in the corner. So I put mine there and at the end of the night when I went to get it it was gone. Stolen. I freaked out. Everything was in there including the keys to my apartment and my cellphone. It was like 1:00AM. After ripping the place apart and asking the bartenders- I knew it was gone. Luckily and unbelievably responsibly of me, I kept a spare set of keys in the bn.com office (it was open all hours cause we were all gungho and stuff) so took a cab over there to grab em before going home. I was pissed. Anyway, while I was in the office I decided to call my cellphone just to see and someone answered. Someone did.
Here's how the conversation went.
Me: Hello?
Guy with weird euro accent: Hello!
Me: Umm.. This is my cellphone.
Guy: Yes. It is.
Me: Do you have my bag too?
Guy: Yes I do.
Me: Ummm... Can I have it back?
Guy: Well where's my bag?
Me: Your bag?
Guy: Yeah my bag. It looks just like your bag.
Me: I don't have your bag...
Guy: Well someone has it.
Me: Well I don't!
Guy: I figure the person with this bag took mine because it looks just like it. So I took yours.
Me: I don't have your bag!!
Guy: Oh. Did you see who took my bag?
Me: No!!!! I want my bag back!
Guy (all dickish): Ok you can come get it in the morning... wait the morning is no good. Maybe later on tomorrow.
Me: Do you realize you stole my bag and this is a frickin major pain in the ass for me!?
Guy: Oh.
Me: Where are you?
Guy: Upper East Side.
Me: Uch! I'm in the West Village. (which is the other end of the earth in the city)
Guy: Well if you want your bag you'll have to come get it.
Me: Do you realize that I've done nothing? As far as I'm concerned you stole my bag you could at least apologize!
Guy: (silence)
Me: Hello?
Guy: Do you want your bag or not?
(UCH! WHAT A DICK!)
Me: Yes!
Guy: Then take down my work address and come get it tomorrow.
I took his address and name and the next day I went into work totally pissed. This prick thief was gonna make me take a trip that realistically could be 40 minutes to get a bag that he stole. I was appreciative to have it back but I was so pissed that I arranged for the work messenger service to go pick it up for me and hoped I could sneak the charge under the radar at work. I decided that as soon as I had my bag in hand I was going to have to seek revenge on him. Harassing phonecalls at work. Maybe try and trick him into going somewhere or doing something dumb.
But when I got my bag back in hand with all my stuff including my wallet with the money in it and all that I dropped my plans on revenge and decided just to write it off. If you lose your stuff in a bar I guess you should be appreciative to get stuff back- regardless of how much of a friggin prick dickhead penisface caused you the problem in the first place.
ok bye!
tOdd
PS. I know I'm behind in pictures. I lost my camera for a few days and just found it again a few days ago when I wanted to take a picture of my feet. It was on books midbookshelf. Not sure how it got there.
So here are some pics.