I'm Sick of You and The American People
I'm sick of it! Last night I was watching the tv and between the commercials and the politicians and all that, it seems everyone knows what I want or should do and they're willing to tell me personally directly.
'You're gonna love the new cinnamon sticks at Pizza Hut!'
(Not true! Cinnamon sticks sound gross to me! That you doesn't apply to me! Some other you maybe but not this you, you cinnamon stick bastards!)
'You gotta come down and test drive the new PT Cruiser!'
(Do I? ME? Do I have to? Now? I can't afford a car so why should I? It'll just be a waste of time! Stop wasting mine by telling me what I gotta!)
Also with the friggin politicians all about...
'The American people don't want a President who can't make decisions.'
(Maybe true for some! Most even! But the American People is sort of a big generalization, no? Some Americans might prefer a dopey stoner President who stares in the fridge for an hour unable to decide between a bowl of honeycomb and jell-o chocolate pudding!)
'The American people don't like negative political advertising.'
(Maybe some don't but alot of us do. And you can bet the ad agencies that specialize negative ad campaigns like it alot! Are they not American people too!?)
So for now on I demand an asterix on all news programs and commercials that refer to us as 'we' or 'you'! They must use the asterix to clarify that the usage of 'you' doesn't necessarily mean you personally, it only applies to specific kinds of yous which you might not be a part of! Or screw the asterix and just use 'probably' or 'might' more! The American people probably don't want a President who can't decide between honeycomb and jell-o chocolate pudding! True! You might like the new cinnamon sticks! Maybe! But I know I probably won't like the cinnamon sticks! Which is why I'd appreciate the 'might'! In fact I might be more inclined to try your gross cinnamon sticks if you were just more honest about what you think we'd think of your cinnamon sticks! We'd like that more! (And I realize me using 'we' referring to you/us is some sort of contradiction in my explanation, so note the asterix:)
* when I say you or we in my statements about you or we, it only applies to specific yous or wees that may not include you.
There. That works for me.