Buggin' on the G

Ok this is kind of gross but it's what's happening so here tis.

I didn't really want to say anything here because people get concerned and stuff, but for the past week Roscoe has been sort of out of it. Really sluggish. Uberlazy. It's been hot out so I sort of half-assumed he's lazy because of the heat and he's covered in fur. I got him a haircut to cool him down and keep a fan on him when he sleeps. But something just seemed off. At the dog park he'd still run around like nuts but then he'd totally crash out for the rest of the day. He was eating and pooping totally normal. I wondered if I was being hypochondriacal for him but he just didn't seem happy.  So I took him to the vet. They checked him out and said he seemed fine but they wanted to take a stool sample. 

As I warned this is where it gets gross.

They gave me a sample cup and said they just need fecal sample the size of a quarter. So before I left the house I started wondering how I was gonna get some poop cleanly into this plastic cup. So shamefully I took a plastic fork with me. I TOLD YOU THIS WAS GROSS! STOP READING NOW! STOP WRITING ABOUT THIS! NO! I WILL PRESS ON! Roscoe pooped on the ground and I took a plastic fork and stabbed some poop and put it in the cup! (And yes someone saw me crouched down going at the pile of poop with a plastic fork! A girl! It was over between us forever even though we hadn't met! You can't ever be sexy after burning that image into someone's head!)

I took the sample to the vet and dropped it off. The next day the vet called me up and told me Roscoe tested positive for a mild case of giardia. A common intestinal bug (literally) and that Roscoe needs to take meds. She also told me that, although super unlikely, Roscoe could possibly transmit giardia (the G) to me! I freaked out! Me? Gross! Look at these aliens! Nature is gross! But the chances were like next to nothing.


I immediately felt sick. My stomach started hurting. I started coming down with all the symptoms. I was convinced I was completely giardiafied! I called up my doctor and told him I was giarded up. He basically said there's three things we can do to handle the G. 1. I could go in and give a stool sample (GROSS!). 2. We could just 'monitor' me. 3. Or he could prescribe something that will knock out the G if the symptoms persist. I told him to prescribe me the stuff just in case. He's cool that way. I asked him if it was ok to take a drug without a confirmed diagnosis and he said basically I'll have a metallic taste in my mouth and I won't want to drink alcohol and my stomach might get upset- but it's not bad or anything.

So right now I'm monitoring me to see if my psychosomatic symptoms persist. And I have the drugs on hand just in case. But I feel better today. So maybe I'm not all G'd up.

As for Roscoe he's been on these drugs for a couple days and is already perking up. He seems to look at me like, 'Thanks, boss!' And I feel like a good dad for refusing to believe it was just the 'heat' that was knocking him out so lazy. I'm also really gonna cut back on doggie day care because I bet that's where he picked up the giardia in the first place. 15 dogs in a pen? Someone's gonna be busting out the G.

By the way, here's Roscoe and my prescription bottles side by side.

Not sure why it's cute that we have the same meds but something about it is sort of nice. Like we're rocking the G together.

ok bye!