Crazy Daring Me to do Stuff
I was outside yesterday standing on the corner waiting for the light to change and there was a cop standing there. I always get a little weirded out when I see cops. Because they have guns. I mean it's so cool that if some robber or whatever breaks into your place you can pick up the phone and basically order up 'guys with guns'. You gotta dig the idea of cops alot. But seeing them just hanging out on the street is sometimes strange to me. I'm like thinking about how that dude is like out on the street ...with a gun. He's like walking around on the street with a gun! If he was so inclined he can take that gun out and shoot it off if he wants. I know he won't ...but he's right there...with a gun. It's on his belt like the old west or whatever.
Then I started checking out that little clip that covers the gun butt and holds it in the holster. And this voice in my head is like (Dude if you totally wanted to... you could so grab that gun!) I'm like, 'No I could not! Cops are trained to like totally club you over the head if you even go near their gun!' (But dude... if you were super quick. Up with the latch and grab it out. He can't react that fast.) 'You think so?' (Totally! If you're zippy one two and out but I bet you could...) 'I bet that button latch is more tricky than it looks...' (How tricky could it be?)
Now keep in mind of course I WAS NOT going to grab for the cops gun for a number of reasons. First off, I don't want to get clubbed on the head. Second, I don't want the cops gun. Third, it's not a good idea. At all in any way. Totally. Of course. But sometimes this voice trickles in my head like double daring me to do stuff. Hey! You could smash that glass counter in the store. Hey! I bet you could steal that thing! Hey! Run out of the cab without paying you could get away with it totally! Hey! Drive the car up on the sidewalk! One turn of the wheel and...Stuff like that. I never do any of the stuff of course. But it's funny how he's always jabbing at me with his double dare craziness. Now don't go thinking I'm crazy. I'm totally not. He is.
Anyway after a bit I realized I was kind of staring at the gun in the cops belt and the cop shot me a look that said, 'You're going to stop looking at my gun. Right now. Don't even think about it. I'll frickin club your head. Go away.' Of course, I looked away and moved away from the cop immediately. I was scared that he even noticed me. (Dude, you're so chicken why don't you go and...) 'Shut up!!!'