The 5-Second Pigeon Story

So this is sort of gonna be weird because this whole story took only 5 seconds in real life but it's gonna take alot longer to describe it...

Today, I was walking down the street thinking about nothing (or so I thought) and I noticed two pigeons in the middle of the street pecking at some food or whatever. A town car was about a block away and it was coming fast. I watched the pigeons and thought that it was sort of coolio that they can judge when to fly off to avoid getting hit by cars. I've noticed that when I drive in the city I always feel like they save flying off till the absolute last minute like dopes. But I guess they just know. I wondered if they time it out by sound or by vision or both. I half-consciously watched the birds and the town car to see how close they come. Just sort of mindless idle walking down the street thought chatter.

Then all of a sudden the town car was there (it was definitely speeding). Both pigeons took off. One cleared it fine. The other took off sort of to the side and it didn't make it in time. The speeding car clipped the bird off the right headlight. I heard a hearty thump and saw a puff of feathers. I was like, 'Holy macanoli!! That pigeon just got hit by the...' Then I see the friggin pigeon zooming straight at my face. My reflexes kicked in and I sort of ducked to the right and the flying bird shot past me. It was so close I could hear the wind as it flew past and there were a few feathers floating around me. I looked behind me and saw the pigeon gain composure  and flap and fly off in the same direction. I seriously think if my cat-like reflexes didn't kick in this thing might have totally smashed me dead in the face fabio-style.

I was totally bugged out because it wasn't like some out of the blue bird out of nowhere fluke thing. I was actually watching the pecking pigeons and half-thinking about them when the thing came flying straight at me. After it flew by, I looked around all half freaked out that I almost got smashed in the face by a bird. I wasn't sure if what just happened really happened the way it happened in my head. Maybe it wasn't even close? And thankfully I saw some woman staring at me with her hand over her mouth. She totally saw that I almost got smashed by the bird. I could see it in her face. I kind of shrugged my hands up like 'Whoa'. And she sort of grimaced like, 'Whoa.' And that was that.

Maybe that's not much of a happening but contained within that five seconds it sure was a great story. It had a setup (with the wondering about the birds and their timing). Some action (the car speeding in and actually hitting a bird). A twist (the bird flying straight at my friggin face). And a happy ending (the bird was ok and so was I).

And that was that with that.

Dopey birds.

ok bye!

tOdd