Aerosmith Beat Down
So I heard some Aerosmith today and it reminded me about when I got my ass kicked at an Aerosmith concert back in the day.
Back in high school I went to see Aerosmith at Madison Square Garden . At the time Aerosmith was still sort of a tough metalish band not the 'I don't want to close my eyes. I don't want to fall asleep' Aerosmith. Anyway, I was with my brand new girlfriend and we went with another couple. We all felt pretty cool for going to see Aerosmith. I wasn't huge on Aerosmith but I'd only been to a few concerts before them (one of them was Hall and Oates) so it was all exciting. I do remember feeling very suburban and wimpy because the crowd was all metalled up. And I wanted to make a good impression for my new girlfriend to show that I could be cool everywhere-- even though I wasn't cool anywhere.
Anyway at some point I went to get food and drinks for everyone. I remember I got a couple large drinks and hot dogs and nachos. The whole deal. Garden prices. It was all sort of piled on one of the flimsy cardboard trays. It wasn't easy cause those trays suck. I was walking carefully through the crowd when all of a sudden I crashed into someone. Or someone crashed into me. I don't really remember. But I do remember seeing one soda flip out of the cardboard holder onto the floor and the other one sort of spilled all over the food. I said, 'Aw, man!'
I look up and there's a dude standing there. He's got no shirt on. Just a leather vest. And he's way tall and like fat strong looking. He's looking down at his boots which are totally splashed with soda. Out of nowhere the guy brings up one fist like a hammer and sort of chops down on my shoulder! Like an orge! He totally like smashed me like gladiator style! I went down like a rock. My tray of food falling on me before hitting the ground and splattering everywhere. It was a blur awash in mustard yellow and soda brown. All of a sudden I was like on my back. Wet and scared.
The fat strong guy stepped past me and walked by. I remember looking up at him and he looked like he was 11 feet tall. He looked down at me and shook his head. Probably disappointed in my lack of fight. A couple people helped me up and asked if I was ok. They called the guy a jerk. I agreed. I wandered back to my seat. All mustard and soda stained up. When my 'girlfriend' at the time asked me what happened I told her I got in a fight with some dude and dropped the tray. I tried to play it up like it was an actual fight and I was tough... but I think the fact that I looked like I was about to cry told the real story.