Long Table Dinner Competition Airball

So the other day I went out to dinner with a group of people. Like 10 of us in total. All sitting at one long table. We weren't all friends together so there was that semi-awkward who sits with who and across from whom or whatever. Whatever it sorted out. At first the whole table talked together to try and maintain a full table conversation- but it soon broke down into two sides. Two different conversations.

Our side's conversation was going along ok for ten minutes or so talking bout this and that or whatever no big whoop, when all of a sudden there was an explosion of laughter from their side of the table. Our side looked over to find out what the joke was but they already moving onward to something else. So our side went back talking bout whatever when a minute or two later another explosion of laughter. We sat silent and nobody on their side offered to fill us in. I guess it was a long story or whatever. That was when I started to feel like our side... was losing.

I decided to try and energize our conversation and be funny. But while struggling to get some funny going their side got yet another wave of laughter. Uch! What was so friggin funny! One dude in my group broke camp (traitor!) to ask, 'What's so funny?' The girl on their side quickly retold a story which was sort of funny but less so because it was a hasty retelling. Then they drifted back into their conversation leaving us hanging with each other.

Now I felt like, 'Uch! That side just through us a frickin bone!' (A funny bone if you will.) Plus our group was breaking down trying to get in on their group! Now I was determined to get a good laugh out of my side. To prove that our side can kick it up funny like the best of them. I went with a story about Roscoe. Figure it would be an easy layup. But as soon as I started telling the story I was thrown offbalance because their side of the table immediately quieted down to listen to me. All eyes on me! Why me? I just wanted an our side laughter. Not a full table laugh! I felt myself heating up with pressure-- but I was determined to hit a three-pointer of funny for our side. To show we could run in the funny game.

Unfortunately this particular Roscoe story didn't go over. Although there are plenty of Roscoe stories to tell, for whatever reason I found myself going with a story about how Roscoe once totally made diarrhea... right front of a church... on Sunday.... while the congregation was on the way out. And how I tried and clean it up which basically smeared diarrhea all over the sidewalk and people had to step over it in the Sunday best. And I felt like I was going to burn in hell for allowing my dog to do that.

But unfortunately, whether it was because I was nervous in the telling of the story or whatever, the story didn't go over. Somehow my telling of it emphasized the gross diarrhea aspect. And the smearing. While people were eating. It was almost like the first utterance of the word 'diarrhea' echoed and drowned out the rest of the story. It was just so out of the blue. Nice dinner conversation blah blah blah then all of a sudden there was diarrhea thrown across the table. Sure, there was polite chuckles but no outburst. Then we split up again and our conversation was worse than ever. It was my fault. I took the ball, dribbled down the court, and tried to be fancy with a big hook shot--- that sailed way over the backboard... and totally out of bounds.

ok bye!

tOdd