Almost Unsolved Mystery-ed Myself
So a few weeks ago I was walking around with Roscoe and I saw a weird looking old-school green truck. Same shape as an ice cream truck type. It was parked and the guy inside was ringing a bell. I wandered over with Roscoe and saw on the side of the truck that the guy is like a mobile knife sharpener. I have never seen anything like it before (maybe they're kinda common but not to me.)
Basically the guy drives around Brooklyn and parks on the street and rings the bell and people come out with their knives or blades or whatever and he sharpens them up. It seemed so coolio and friendly neighborhoodish. Sort of felt like a timewarp relic business of sorts and it made me chalk up yet another coolio thing about Brooklyn.
I asked the guy if he ever stops on my street. He told me he does sometimes and to listen for the bell. I have one kitchen knife and it could be sharper I guess so I made a mental note of it. (granted my mental notes are the equivalent of cocktail napkin scribbles at 3AM in some bar but whatever.) I've had this knife for years and never sharpened it once. And I wanted to support his business in any case. This was a few weeks ago and basically I forgot about knife sharpener guy until yesterday...
I googled and found a truck similar. Sort of looked like this but with a window on the side. So you know.
Anyway, yesterday I was lying on the couch in half-napland watching tv when I heard this bell ringing outside. At first I didn't think anything of it and just flipped channels and worked on staying awake. It was just some random bell ringing on and off for like ten minutes and it started to get on my nerves a little. Then all of a sudden it dawned on me. I was like, 'Holy smokes! That's the sharpener truck bell! Sharpener man is on my street!!'
I run to my window and poke my head out. (I'm on the 4th floor) I see the truck half way down my block ringing his bell. I shut the window and ran to the kitchen all excited to have my knife sharpened. It just seemed like fun. I put on my slippers (I go outside in them sometimes), grab the knife out of my kitchen and head out my apartment door (shutting the door in Roscoe's face who looked extra sad because he saw I was totally excited and rushed about something but then he was invited to come along and see.)
I'm hustling down the stairs when it dawned on me, "Dummy! Calm down! You're rushing down stairs with a big butcher knife while wearing your slippers! (emphasis on the slip!) To get a friggin knife sharpened!" And slowed everything down safe style.
But I thought about the idea of having a bad slip on the stairs and tumbling down with my knife and landing at the bottom of the stairs all self-stabbed in the chest and self-murdered up dead. (sorry mom). (my mom hates reading stuff like this)
I thought about what people would think when they found me all freshly deaded up at the bottom of the stairs. In my slippers? If I was a detective, I'd just assume that this guy was murdered! Or at least it would have be a theory, right? Why would I be on the first floor with a butcher knife sticking out of me? Looks suspicious to say the least! Plus the tumble down the stairs might have bruised me up a bit --so evidence of a struggle? Maybe?
Detective guy would probably conclude that a murderer came to my front door and buzzed my buzzer. I went downstairs in my slippers to answer. The murderer then murdered me with a butcher knife and left me lying on the floor inside. Right? I mean would a cop really be able to piece together why I'd be running down the stairs with a butcher knife to catch the friendly neighborhood sharpener man? That'd be a stretch, no? A little too convenient? Who knows...
Anyway, I got out the front door just in time to see sharpener truck driving away. I chased after him for a few steps but realized I shouldn't push my luck with the running with knife situation.... (plus a guy running down the street in his slippers and a big butcher knife simply isn't exactly friendly neighborhoody.)