So the other night I was out in Los Angeles at a sushi place with a friend of mine. It was sort of late-ish and the place was closing down when a couple walked in and they were immediately seated across from us. The guy was wearing all black clothes and some sort of funky hat and the girl had a yellow sweatshirt with the hood up. Celebs! Turns out twas Nicole Richie and that boyfriend dad dude of hers. Rocker Jimmy or whatever.
These two people:
I was like, 'Holy smokes! It's that chick from Us Weekly and that guy from...I don't know! Sitting right over there!' I admit I got some celebrity tingles seeing them sitting over there like normal people. I strained to tune in to their conversation hoping to get some scoop or just hear what the hell these two people talk about. But they both were low talkers. Then I thought...
I SHOULD TAKE A PICTURE OF HER!!! OF THEM!!! IT COULD BE WORTH LIKE MONEY! I didn't have my camera with me (of course). It was in the car. But I had my cellphone camera! I fiddled with it in my pocket. Wondering if I could do it on the sly. But it was only us in the restaurant. It would be way obvious. Especially because it wasn't like we were walking by. I'd take the picture (breaking the quiet of the restaurant with an electronic click) and still sit there at our table like a schmuck. On top of it, I didn't think I could sell a cellphone photo.
Then I thought--- we could get the check, I could run out to the car, get the camera, run back in and surprise click them in their face and run away cackling like a cacklercock! How much would that picture be worth?! With a real camera too! I can use money! I like money! I stared at them sitting there. Both quietly eating dinner and weighed out the options. Could I be that guy? That sleazy space invader with a camera? They seemed like nice people. She even smiled and nodded at me once. Could I backstab her smile nod with a big flashbulb click in her face??
But we left the restaurant.... and just drove off. I couldn't do it. It just felt too sleazy and weird and creepy. We turned the corner and we headed down the road when I mentioned the very 'out of towner' idea of clicking their picture to my friend. That I had been thinking about it. I was ashamed at the thought as it seems to break some sort of local 'cool' protocol or something. My friend knows LA stuff pretty well tho and was like, 'Oh dude! An Nicole Richie eating picture? That's good for like 25k....'
I was like, 25k!? For a clicky click!!? WTF!!? Turn around! But we were already down the road... and I was already down the road of not being that guy.
(However, if I had know it was 25k while I was debating in the first place... I get the feeling that right now I'd be cackling like a cacklecock.)