Missing Subway and Wondering About My Feet
So when I lived in the West Village I used to go to Subway (sandwich shop) for lunch like all the time. I put myself on the diet that Jared was on and I lost like 20 pounds. I would get a veggie delite sandwich with Wow! Doritos and pink lemonade. The Wow! chips didn't have a bad 'effect' on me. Anyway now that I'm in Brooklyn there ain't no Subway around and I've been eating alot of junk for lunch and started gaining weight again. So today I went down to my new PO box to check the mail and I noticed there was a Blimpie sandwich shop. I thought, 'Maybe I'll get Blimpie now.' So I go in and it's like dirty and stuff but I'm like whatever. I'm standing on line and wearing flipflops and I start staring at my feet.
I noticed how I have big Fred Flintstone feet and they have hair on them. Awful feet. I started thinking about how when I started losing hair on my head I started growing hair on my feet. And I wondered about my genetics and what got so screwed up that hair would fall out of my head and actually grow on my feet! The only reason humans should have ever grown hair on their feet is for warm feet I guess. How was this not worked out of evolution? And my hair falling out of my head makes no sense doubly as now I have no hair to keep my head warm.
Anyway I get up to the front of the line and order a 'veggie sandwich' and the guy says, "You want lettuce, tomato, onion sandwich?" And I looked and the selection of veggies ain't nothing like Subway's selection. Just like six things to choose from. And there was no Wow! chips or pink lemonade. I had to get regular chips and fruit punch. It was all gross and I threw it away. Maybe Blimpie is better for sandwiches with meat but for veggies only it's a no-go. I'm not a vegetarian I just like a veggie sandwich for lunch. So now what? I don't know. My feet are like Sasquatch feet.