Answered a Fall for Help
So on Saturday night I headed out to see Robyn Hitchcock play at Irving Plaza!
Here's a picture:
Anyway, afterwards I was walking around looking for a cab and saw this group of four people walking toward me crossing the street at a red light. Two dudes and two chicks. One of the guys looked like all drunk or messed up. All of a sudden I see him start to stumble fall over drunk style. He whomps himself down on the hood of a car and then collapses in the street! His friends were trying to help him up but he wasn't moving at all. The light changed green and horns started blaring. They were yelling at him to get up but he was out cold. I was like, 'Oh man... I'm gonna have to like... be the guy who goes and helps!'
I went over and was like, 'Umm.. do you need help?' The girl looked all desperate and was like, 'Yes! Please help us! Please!' I was like, 'Oh man, I actually am involved now in reality!' I grabbed one underarm and the other dude grabbed the other and we tried to get him to his feet. (It's weird how you can be walking down the street one moment and the next you're trying to lift an oversized asian dude at a busy intersection.) We couldn't get him to stand up. He was all dead weight. No sign of life. All of a sudden it dawned on me that this guy might not be dead drunk... he might be a newly dead guy! I was like, 'Oh man! I'm like totally touching a dead guy! Ew!'
We dragged him to the sidewalk army style with his legs dragging and lay him down on the sidewalk. At this point a crowd is gathering. I was like, 'Please don't be a dead guy... please don't be a dead guy...' Thankfully, he started snoring. Like that passout unconscious weird deep snore. I felt relieved that I didn't just touch a dead guy...ummm... as well as the fact that he wasn't dead. The friend started slapping him in the face a little telling him to wake up and the guy snapped awake all angry yelling that he's awake and being all shovey and get off me! and pissed.
At that point I just walked away-- mission accomplished. Feeling all puffed-up hero-y about myself for being helpful when help was needed. But then I realized that it's not particularly hero-y to pitch in on a bad situation like that... it really should just be the default reaction.