Bad Night's Sleep
So on Saturday I went up to Connecticut and hung out with some friends from college for the night. By 'hanging out' I mean 'drink beer with'. We stayed at a friends house who is married and has a new kid and stuff. (His wife was real psyched to have a bunch of drunk idiots messing up her house but she was actually very cool about it.) Anyway, when it came down to go to sleep/passout the five of us all piled into this one guest bedroom. It was suggested that we all sleep in the one room because the kid gets up at like 7AM everyday. And since we were going to sleep at 4ish - if we wanted to wake up in three hours we could sleep on the couch downstairs or something... but the kid is gonna wanna play.
So in the guestroom there was a big bed, cushions on the floor and one inflatable mattress. I nabbed the inflatobed and got all set to sleep it up. But before I could fall asleep... the snoring started. Two of the guys sleeping in the room snore loud enough to rattle the friggin windows. Especially when they've boozed it up. I tried to imagine there was no snoring going on but it was like dueling banjos with the stereo snoring. So I dragged the inflatobed into the bathroom and shut the door. It blocked out the sound just enough that I knew I could fall asleep.
I laid down on the inflatobed and all was great for like 5 seconds. quiet. dark...nice....ahhh... Then 'Pop!...sssss.... (No!) ....ssss....' Apparently the bed had caught a little on the corner the bathroom sink cabinet and somehow me lying on it punctured a hole in it. I was like... no no no! NOoooo! I heard the hissing noise and couldn't believe it. (Fuck!) I put my finger over the hole in to stop the air from escaping and thought about my options:
1. Abandon the inflatobed and go downstairs to the couch and have a kid jump on my head in a few hours.
2. Go back into the bedroom with the snorers and try and squeeze onto the bed.
3. Sleep on the carpet in the room with the snorers.
4. Try and rummage through the whole house for duct tape to fix the inflatobed.
5. Ignore the hole altogether and just try to fall asleep as fast as possible. (I thought maybe if I could fall asleep before the whole thing totally deflated I'd be able to sleep on the floor but not care because I'd already be asleep and not know that I was sleeping on the floor...)
I decided to do #5. And I took my finger off the hole and tried to race to sleepyland as fast as possible and ignore the hissing and slow deflation.
But Plan #5 actually wasn't a great idea in sober retrospect. I found it to be impossible to fall asleep on a rapidly deflating mattress. And I soon enough was lying flat on my back on the cold floor. So I moved onto option #6. Roll over onto the gross bathroom mat like a dog with a blanket and pillow and just get the night over with. I was too tired to even think of an option #7.
My back still hurts but somehow it beat sleeping in the same room with those chainsaw snorers...