The Subway Scammer Sucker
So the other day I was riding along on the subway when someone came into the car and loudly announced he was disabled and looking for money. I glanced at the guy as he limped his way toward us and noticed that he was likely a scammer. His voice was a little too 'put on' and he also curled one arm up to his chest with a half-closed fist-- but that arm was like all muscular like he's been working out with it. Plus it had a tattoo that looked pretty badass. I went back to hiding behind my headphones and magazine and waited for the awkward moment of 'not giving' to pass by. And I was relieved when the dude next to me started rooting around in his bag for some money. Took the pressure off me to donate to the 'cause'.
Anyway, he gives the guy a dollar and scammer guy thanks him with an obvious 'dank doo' and keeps fake limping out the door into the next car. (btw he opened the tricky subway door with no problem with his 'good arm'.) After he was gone, this other guy said, 'Oh man. I see that guy all the time. There's always something different wrong with him. F-in bullshit.' The guy who donated the dollar-- let's call him Frank-- realized he was just scammed and was immediately defensive...
Frank said, 'Oh! Oh yeah! I knew he was scamming but he was good at it! He was putting the effort into it...so...that's why I... ' I could feel everyone rolling their eyes at the excuse. Then he turned to me and said, 'He was doing a good job right?' I plucked an earbud out of my ear and backed him up... I agreed the scammer did a good job.
Then Frank starts telling me a story directly. (Maybe to detract attention from his needless embarrassment). The story was like, 'Get this. You know one time I was gonna swipe myself into the subway right? And there was this lady who couldn't get her card to work so I helped out and used my own card to swipe her through, right? Be a nice guy. But then when I tried my card after her then my card wouldn't work!? So I asked the lady if I could try her card that didn't work because maybe it would work for me and she didn't...' On and on...
At this point I start to suspect Frank might be a little off. He was too talky and worked up so I was thankful when I saw my stop was next. As we roll into the station Frank was still telling his babbly card swipe story that I'd lost track of. When the train came to a stop I got up and apologized for leaving-- Frank looked stunned. He gave me an openmouthed look like he couldn't believe my rudeness for leaving mid-story. I tense-smile shrugged and headed off the train then looked back at him from the platform. He was still staring at me with a look of disbelief at my lack of etiquette. As if I would have missed my stop to hear the end of his story...
Which I might have--- if it was a good tale.
(At least better than this one I just typed up...)