Ok here's what happened. I head out on Saturday to see Ring 2 with a friend of mine. A 3PM show. We meet in front of the theater and I look up at the board. Ring 2 started at 2:30. Doh! I messed up the friggin movie time AGAIN. My friend gave that 'You're a dope. You know that, right?' look. We looked at what else was playing and I saw there was this movie called 'Downfall'. I wasn't sure what it was about-- but for some reason I thought it was about Hitler. I like Hitler stuff so I asked the old lady in the booth if Downfall was about Hitler. She said, 'No... it's about Marilyn Monroe.' I was like, 'Shoot...' She was like, 'Yes! It's about Hitler!' I was like, 'Oh.' We all laughed. Then I asked her if 'Robots' was about Hitler too. She just shot me a look. 

On an impulse movie ticket buy, we headed on in for the Hitler flick. It's a german film with subtitles. Here's the preview of the Downfall movie if you're curious. All in all this movie is a great video rental if you dig WWII stuff. There's some awesomeness in this movie. The guy who plays Hitler is great. It does run a solid 40 minutes too long- but if you're a nazi or war buff you'll dig this flick big time. DVD it when it comes out.

Basically the bulk of this movie takes place in Hitler's bunker while everything was falling apart at the end of the war. 

Here's loose translation of the whole movie:



Colonel Clink, General Bratwurst, and Dr. Wienerschnitzel walk into Hitler's war room.  Hitler is furiously drawing circles on a piece of paper.

Colonel Clink: Hey Hitler!

General Bratwurst: Hey Hitler!

Dr. Wienerschnizel: Hey Mein Fuhrer!

Colonel Clink: Hey Hitler! My Fuhrer. Ummm... Just fyi... Berlin is like ummm... totally surrounded and we have no more troops left and...

Hitler (furious): Yes we do, ass! Shut up! We have lots of troops!

Colonel Clink: We do?

Hitler: Yes, dope! We have plenty! In fact, we have so many troops that they should call us.... Overtrooper Supermen!... Army... people.

Colonel Clink: What? My fuhrer I'm confused...

General Bratwurst: Stop questioning the Fuhrer, you dope! Hey Hitler!

Hitler: Yeah what he said. Now everyone get out! I gotta do some stuff! 

Dr. Wienerschnizel: Hey Hitler! Hey Our Overtrooper Supermen!

Colonel Clink: Hey Hitler... (under his breath) ..jeez...



Clink, Bratwurst and Wienerschnitzel stand around in the hall and talk whispering... except Dr. Wienerschnizel who yells everything.

Colonel Clink: Dude, we gotta do something Hitler's gone all mental...we got no troops.....what's he talking about? What the f**k?

General Bratwurst: Dude, I know, dude. Hitler has gone all mental. What the hell? He's all yelly all the time.

Colonel Clink: I know... He's so friggin yelly. He's gotta chill. Hey you notice it smells like fart all the time in his room?

Dr. Wienerschnizel: Hey Trooper Fuhrer Fart!

Colonel Clink: Shut up, dope... doctor... dickhead...what's wrong with you?

Dr. Wienerschnizel: Everything!

General Bratwurst: Screw him. What do you think we should do?

Colonel Clink: I don't know... we can shoot each other! That's sort of a plan.

General Bratwurst: Shooting each other? That's your plan? 

Colonel Clink: You got a better one?

Dr. Wienerschinzel: Hey Hitler! Troop Fart!

General Bratwurst: We could shoot him if he doesn't shut up. 

Colonel Clink: Yeah I guess we could do that. But first let's go talk to Hitler and see if he's less mental. Maybe the room is less farty too.



The three enter the room again. They catch the tail end of Hitler ripping a fart. 

Hitler shakes a couch pillow around to distribute the smell. He pretends like nothing happened.

General Bratwurst: Hey Hitler!

Colonel Clink: Hey Hitler!

Dr. Wienerschinzel: Hey Hitler.... Farted!

Hitler: Who farted?

Dr. Wienerschnitzel :  Mein fuhrer.... farted.

Hitler (furious): Nein!! Nein mein fuhrer farted! Oot ever smelt it dealt it! OOT EVER SMELT IT DEALT IT!! 

Colonel Clink: Ok fuhrer you didn't fart. It just wreaks like fart and you were the only on in here. Forget it. Anyhey Hitler, we just got a report in that the Russians are like right outside. They're breaking all our stuff! Like smashing all our buildings and stuff!

Hitler: Nein. Not breaking. Pre-building. It's part of the master plan. See, it's easier to build new modern buildings once the old stupid buildings are smashed down. The Russians are the Third Reich construction crew! They're contractors. Russians work cheap, yknow.

General Bratwurst: Umm.. But some of the building they're knocking down have people inside and stuff. That kind of umm..

Hitler: for them? Totally. They should have read the memos.

General Bratwurst: Hey Hitler! I think we need to tell the Russians to halt umm... "construction"...  and get outta here. 

Hitler: Nein.

They stare at Hitler. Hitler picks his nose and looks at the booger.

General Bratwurst: That's it? Just... nein.

Hitler: Nein.

Hitler rolls the booger.

General Bratwurst: Umm... Nein as in... 'That's it. Nothing more to say 'nein?'. Or 'Nein'.... as in actually there's more to the story.. nein?

Hitler eats the booger. He rolls his eyes up toward the ceiling.

Dr. Wienerschnitzel: Hey Hitler!!!

Hitler: What!? What!! Now you broke my concentration! Now I forgot everything! Everyone get out! That includes me! 

Hitler whomps his head down on the table and starts snoring.

General Bratwurst (whispery): Psst... Hey.... Hitler?

Dr. Wienerschnitzel: Hey Camp Beverly Berlin Troop Beverly Hills! Hey Boogereater, da snoozy fuhrer!



We hear a LOUD gun shot.

General Bratwurst: Holy schizer!!! What the hell was that?

Colonel Clink: It came out of Hitler's room!

Dr. Wienerschnitzel: Hey Bang Bang Booger Farty Fuhrer!

The three run into Hitler's room and see Hitler has shot himself in his own butt. 

Hitler (sadly): Nein...

General Bratwurst: Hey Hitler! What are you doing?

Hitler: It was just a practice shot to see how it felt. My butt is the most smushy part of me and I figured it would hurt the least but man o man this stings like a bitch!

Dr. Wienerschnitzel : Bitch Fuhrer!

Hitler: Who you calling a bitch, Doctor.... Bitch?

Dr. Wienerschnitzel : Hey...  booger... bitch?

Hitler shoots Dr. Wienerschnitzel in the chest. He falls dead. 

Colonel Clink: Hey Hitler! Chill dude! Chill! Chill out! Jeezus!

Hitler: Nein! Nein chill out! Nein mein chuck chill out!!!

Hitler farts loudly. Hitler immediately shoots himself in his other butt cheek. Bang!

Hitler: Nein! Ow! Why! Ein! Nein!

General Bratwurst: Dude! You gotta chill out! You're all over the road!

Colonel Clink: Jeez that fart stinks like schizer! What the hell are you eating in here?!

Hitler shoots Colonel Clink and General Bratwurst dead.

Hitler looks into the camera.

Hitler: Nein. Booger. Nein. Fart. Hey Hitler... Mein me.

(fade to black)

We hear one gunshot.

Hitler (sadly. from a distance): Ow.. Mein penis...