Kung Fu Hustle

I knew nothing about this movie going in. Zero. I'd only heard the title and saw the poster. And it totally paid off. Trust me with this one thing. Start doing media blockouts everything you know you're going to see or read. Just blockout all reviews. All info. If you know you're gonna see it. Just ignore everything else. No reviews. No articles. This theory was driven home in me years ago when I saw From Dusk Till Dawn and didn't know it involved vampires! It made that movie 3x mo bettah. When what's her face snapped her head down and was all vampire-y I was like "Awesome!!!" Go cold! Same with books! Skip the stupid chatty jacket flap! Sometimes it will say stupid crap like, 'When a young woman is murdered blah blah...' That murder might happen only 50 pages in! Why the hell should you know that?!

Oh wait this is supposed to be a movie review for a movie. Not me spouting dopey recommendations. Right. Ok. Kung Fu Hustle. It's sort of hard to write a review for this movie because it really just needs to be seen. It's great. When I first heard about this movie I thought it was another Kung Pow: Enter the Fist. Remember that crapmobile? Look at it. Terrible. (actually I never saw it but it looks like a crapmobile) Anyway, it's safe to assume this ain't no Kung Pow.

Anyway, I was a bit in awe of this movie. It was friggin wild. And it looked great. It was packed with goodies. And it is probably one of the besterest stoner movies ever made. In the world of stoner flicks I think this movie races to the top five of all time. Along with...umm... along with.... that one... with that guy ...with the shirt... who... um...  I don't remember actually. So help me out enter your stoner movie suggestions here.

Unfortunately I had a problem while watching this movie. I was exhausted. Having a puppy turns out is actually a sh*tload of work (so to speak) and I've been waking up at like 6:30AM everyday. Which has thrown my natural biorhythm of laziness wheneveryness right out of the friggin window. So sitting in a dark theater became a struggle because the siren song from Nappynap Island was coasting in off the clouds. Sweet siren song... Nappynap Island calls....with its glowing green coconuts... and island foofoo frogs....and giant hula alien.... and pigs who walk on two feet.. SNORT! I'd do a headnod snap back awake. During down time in the movie I'd have to fight off sleep like karate style. It was sort of frustrating because I didn't want to miss stuff or pass out altogether.

But I was alert and aware enough to know that what I was seeing was something hugely good. Yeah yeah it did have a few surprisingly draggy scenes. Yeah yeah a bunch of the jokes were just straight corny- but YEAH! F**K YEAH! The freaky freedom flick flag flew! This movie was splattered all over the place. It was like karate movie improv set in the vibrations of a gong. It rippled goodness waves. I think I might see it again in the theater. I think its worth a second big screen viewing. It was so good I'm really considering it...  (But then again I'll probably just look for it on the net. shhh....)

Three Good Things About this Movie

- The fight with the musicians was fantabularblastifying.
- I walked out thinking, 'What the f**k did I just watch?'
- It had a purity to it like it was made in a bubble.

Three Bad Things About this Movie

- Whenever it slowed down it seemed to slow down hard. Almost whiplashy.
- Although I gave it a wide range to screw around sometimes the plot just got too wobbily.
- I can't remember alot of the movie. It's really sort of blurry for some reason.

All in all, I gotta say go see this movie. Even if you don't like it at all... you'll still like it alot. It's too outrageously splashy to dislike. It's got awesome movie karate. Every time I felt like I had enough and was going to drop out of the movie-- it would come at me hard with something that was surprising, or flatout funny, or crazy, or visually pow pow pow pow. And around the 3/4 mark I slid off my seat, my knees hit the floor of the sticky theater, and I clonked my head into the seat in front of me- as I attempted to bow before the master.