V for Vendetta

So tonight I volunteered to venture down the street for some virtual violence and just veg out in front of the very... vuh... video..... visual... umm... vilify... vampire...vagina vageen... ummm  ? Ok screw it! I was gonna try to write this whole review using V words all over the place but I decided that would be very very very very very very hard to do-- especially if I was going to try very hard not to use very very much.

I picked up twizz and almond joy and (surprisingly good) ranch flavored soy crisps (my face is fat again) and a water for this movie. I was a little guilty about the loudness of their crunch of the soy crisps though so I tried to be quiet about it by sucking on them before chomping them up. Chomp.

Anyway, V. Last night on the walk home from this flick I tried to process it all in my head. Adding up how I felt about this movie was a little bit like doing artistic math. I had mixed feelings throughout. All over the road actually. My brain went like this in order of appearance:

This movie looks like it's gonna suck! Wait a second this movie might be way coolio! That mask looks weird I hope I get used to it. Natalie Portman looks hot! This movie is boring. I'm annoyed. This movie is reminding me of other movies. Batman? Darkman? 1984? What is it?  Uch. This movie sucks. Holy shit! This movie is friggin unbelievably good! I gotta wake up and focus on this! This movie is awesome!!! Where's my friggin twizzlers? Wow I can't believe they just said that! Cool! That fight scene was too choppy. That should have been cooler. This movie is dumb. I wanna make movies too! Wow the world is really screwed up. Our governments are crazy. Anarchy! Anarchy! I'm bored again. Power is way powerful. Natalie Portman's nipples! Nice! This is Fight Clubby. That political statement was so heavy handed. A swastika over the british flag? Whatever. This movie is a like a bad acid trip. That dialogue sucked. This movie isn't saying anything. I don't understand what's going on. I can't understand british people sometimes.  They sound like they're all talking with a fake accent. That mask is cool looking! This is important! This is like Fahrenheit in comic book form! Did I shut off the stove? This movie is a big mess. I'm scared I'm missing it. I can't wait for this to be on DVD! Politainment! Is that a new word? I gotta get more involved with stuff in general. I think this movie is smarter than me. No! I'm smarter than this movie! I can't figure out if I like this. It's playing tricks on me. When are they gonna shave her head already? Are people actually going to do something in real life? Syriana still sucks. I should be loving this but I'm not. I don't want bird flu. Control is controlling. I want a hero! That was so obvious. I like Natalie Portman. Enough already, I get the point. This movie is horrible! That looked awesome! It's overkilling itself. I hate governments! This movie is super irresponsible and arrogant. I'm gonna protest something! Where's my almond joy? I need some energy! I'm scared of the government. Terrorism works sometimes! At least it's honest about that. Uh oh spaghettio. I can't believe this movie. What's going on in Britain anyway? I think the revolution is going to be televised! I hope so at least! I have to pee. I can hold it. This is great. I'm mad as hell and I'm not gonna take this anymore! I'm not mad enough. I'm sort of mad about that at least. It's time we made a stand and took back the world! It's governments that are the problem! Not people! Ok let's wrap this up already. I've had enough. I'm not doing anything about anything and I know it. We have to do something! Balls out! Relax. It's just a movie that wants your money, stupid. Cool closing credits! Now I gotta go think about things...

Ok enough of that. Anyway, this is the best movie this year for sure. It definitely is neckdeep in flaws but there's something smart and so ballsily good about it that it more than makes up for its mistakes. And there's some real fake power under the surface from a mass media standpoint. Yeah yadda "Terrorism is necessary sometimes" is a umm... questionable message. But it made me really happy to see some stab at truth and protest in anything... so it's not too hard to forgive the fact that the mixed messages were blathered out from behind some dopey grinning mask.

Three Good Things About this Movie

- It's a start.
- It really was sort of stunning how blatantly it talked current politics.
- I liked that it pushed the idea of personal responsibility.

Three Bad Things About this Movie

- It never found a clean rhythm.
- The mask was kind of annoying throughout. And his voice sounded dubbed the whole time.
- It cockout bragged about what it was doing.

All in all I think this movie needs to be seen. There really is something very good about it (and something really bad about it)... in more ways than one. But overcoming the dopeyness of this flick was the fact that it seemed passionate about what it was saying. And that it wants to serve as some sort of wake up call to the slacker vibe of the world-- but in this explosive jumbled mess, when all was said and done-- it felt like it was more about straight-up slackspoitation just for the hell of it.

<<<CHYATT
 

PS. FINALLY something to see!

PPS. Here's a Talking Heads song called Don't Worry About the Government