* Monday*s Nuts*       *
   *                 *              *

couple o' owies 4 ya.

Dear Todd,

This "balls" story is a bit of a doosey.  I was a martial artist for the
majority of my childhood and adolescence, and in my dojo (place where
martial artists practice and perform their art) there was a class-clown
named Andy. Well, one day Andy had to spar with me in preparation for a
tournament with another school the next week.  Two problems for Andy: 1-He
was going up against the best guy in the dojo and undefeated tournament
champion for 18 consecutive months on the Midwest Karate Circuit (myself),
and 2-He forgot to wear his cup.

So Andy and I begin to dance and the action heats up enough for me to throw
him to the ground. He lands in a crabwalk position (Stomach up with feet and
hands on the ground and body in the air, with legs spread).  Not knowing
that he forgot to wear his cup, I instinctively thrust-kicked him directly
in the Junk with quite a bit of force.  This sent Andy flying across the mat
into the wall, but only when he landed did everyone notice that he was
holding his crotch instead of his back that hit the wall.  Andy laid there
moaning like a dying goose for about 10 minutes before he was scooped up by
a few guys.  Needless to say, he didnt make it to the tournament.

Moral: Would you jump out of an airplane without your parachute pack????
Then why in God's name would you spar a Blackbelt without a cup on????

-Charlie Kahr (the guy that sent you the boobah.com link)


This is an incident that happened about thirty years ago. I had just
started first grade, and my best friend, a boy, was still in kindergarten,
being eleven months younger than me. I had seen something at school which
had caught my interest. I saw two kids fighting, and one kicked the other
between the legs, and the boy dropped to the ground like I'd never seen
anyone drop before. I was curious.

I was also a smart child. Instead of going straight home after school that
day, I detoured to my friend's house. Very politely, I asked him if he
minded if I tried something on him. The trust this kid had in me must have
been amazing, because he had scars on his head from me seeing if a metal
rake would hurt him, a year or two before. Or so he says. To this day, I
don't recall the incident, but I have seen the scars. Anyways, I digress.
He said I could do it, so you can guess what I did.

I peered at him curiously as he writhed around on the ground cupping his
little nads, marvelling at how he had tears in his eyes yet no voice to
cry. He sounded like he had no breath. After about two seconds of watching
him, and satisfied that my experiment had worked the way I thought it
might, I went left and went home.

By the way. I think your sense of humour is great. I think I'm in love with
Mep, and we need more skin shots of ...wait, it's just a cartoon. But
yes...thank you for the laughs.

- Tanya,
BC, Canada.


Got a story involving someone being hit or hitting upside the testicles in one way or another?

If you sent yours in a while ago and you're mad that it's not been featured yet please resend.

Also let me know where you're from...

Send it in.

<<< previous nuts