* Monday*s Nuts*       *            *
   *                 *              *
Hey! I need more balls stories or the poems are coming back! Send it in.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Having been a female student trainer for football and other sports I
have never been hit in the balls, but  have tended to several guys who
were.  Yes, I turned down more than one invitation to kiss it and make
it better.  In high school, we had a senior who got  towel snapped in
the junk when he was coming out of the shower naked. I didn't know high
school seniors could cry that hard.

The incident from college that sticks in my mind happened at a
university in the southeast about four years ago.  Some members of the
golf team had stopped by the stadium to watch the baseball team play a
nearby college.  Apparently some people in  their vicinity were heckling
a player on the field from the opposing team,   That player eventually
hauled off and threw the ball in the general direction of the hecklers.
It caught unsuspecting golfer Josh Broadaway square in the groin.  He
went down hard and it was obvious from the speed of the ball he might be
hurt badly.   He ended up in the local hospital and was then transferred
to a nearby hospital to treat his injured testicles.  Who'd have thought
you needed to wear a cup just to WATCH a baseball game?   

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When I was in 8th grade I was stalked constantly by this bully,  a kid much stronger, taller and bigger than me.  One day he saw me in the school library and came up real close to me, his face almost touching mine.  Suddenly I felt this sharp pain between my legs. Quickly it spread up to my stomach.   He had brought his knee up hard and hit me perfectly on target.  I was helpless to do anything.  I just gasped, jack-knifed over in half and my knees turned to jelly.  I collapsed on the floor and drew my knees up,  it was involuntary and there was nothing else I could do.  It was the worse pain I ever felt.  The humiliating thing was that there was an audience and I heard in the background , laughter and giggling.   An awful memory.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WARNING BOUT THE NEXT ONE: NOT FUN TO READ

dear odd todd,

i was about 11 years old when i read this article at the doctors office. i have never been the same since nor have i ever forgotten it. it seems that this article is fairly famous and i found it on my first try,top of the page on a goggle search.it is the ultimate ball story.

One morning I was called to the emergency room by the head ER nurse. She directed me to a patient who had refused to describe his problem other than to say that he "needed a doctor who took care of men's troubles." The patient, about 40, was pale, febrile, and obviously uncomfortable, and had little to say as he gingerly opened his trousers to expose a bit of angry red and black-and-blue scrotal skin.
After I asked the nurse to leave us, the patient permitted me to remove his trousers, shorts, and two or three yards of foul-smelling stained gauze wrapped about his scrotum, which was swollen to twice the size of a grapefruit and extremely tender. A jagged zig-zag laceration, oozing pus and blood, extended down the left scrotum.
Amid the matted hair, edematous skin, and various exudates, I saw some half-buried dark linear objects and asked the patient what they were. Several days earlier, he replied, he had injured himself in the machine shop where he worked, and had closed the laceration himself with a heavy-duty stapling gun. The dark objects were one-inch staple of the type used in putting up wallboard.
We x-rayed the patient's scrotum to locate the staples; admitted him to the hospital; and gave him tetanus antitoxin, broad-spectrum antibacterial therapy, and hexachlorophene sitz baths prior to surgery the next morning. The procedure consisted of exploration and debridement of the left side of the scrotal pouch. Eight rusty staples were retrieved, and the skin edges were trimmed and freshened. The left testis had been avulsed and was missing. The stump of the spermatic cord was recovered at the inguinal canal, debrided, and the vessels ligated properly, though not much of a hematoma was present. Through-and-through Penrose drains were sutured loosely in site, and the skin was loosely closed.
Convalescence was uneventful, and before his release from the hospital less than a week later, the patient confided the rest of his story to me. An unmarried loner, he usually didn't leave the machine shop at lunchtime with his co-workers. Finding himself alone, he had begun the regular practice of mastubating by holding his penis against the canvas drive-belt of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. One day, as he approached orgasm, he lost his concentration and leaned too close to the belt. When his scrotum suddenly became caught between the pulley-wheel and the drive-belt, he was thrown into the air and landed a few feet away. Unaware that he had lost his left testis, and perhaps too stunned to feel much pain, he stapled the wound closed and resumed work. I can only assume he abandoned this method of self-gratification.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Got a story involving someone being hit or hitting upside the testicles in one way or another?

If you sent yours in a while ago and you're mad that it's not been featured yet please resend.

Also let me know where you're from...

Send it in.

<<< previous nuts