October 25 2010

Random Emails Today Too!

Here’s a bunch of emails that came in the last week or so! Read em up if you wanna!

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Hey Todd,

I hope things are going well for you. Since the hosts of Comical Radio
had such a great time interviewing you back in the spring, would you
like to come back on the show on a Friday in the near future?
We’re at a different time now, 12-2 p.m.

Just let me know.
Thanks!
Kylie
http://www.comicalradio.com/


Hi Todd,

I’ve been living with my boyfriend for about five months now. He just graduated Year 12 and he works part-time in KFC, so there are a couple of nights when I just stay at home by myself, keeping myself busy with my school work or Facebook.

One night, he came home after work and for some reason, I missed him more than ever, even though we only had a few hours apart from each other. He obviously felt the same, because he dropped his bag, ran over to me and tackle-hugged me, turning just in time for me to land on top of him instead of the floor. Then he grimaced and started groaning. I raised my eyebrows and realized both of my knees have accidentally nailed him into his nuts. I giggled a bit and he hugged me really tight, closed his eyes and groaned again. I guess the pain was unbearable because he winded one arm around my waist tight instead, moved me so I was still on him but away from his balls, put his other hand on his crotch. He rolled me and him over slightly sideways and clutched his balls really tight. He kissed me on the forehead, closed his eyes and started breathing heavily. I felt so sorry for him, all the while I could only cringed at him, kissing his neck and telling him I was sorry.

I had to take off his jeans for him later when we got back into the room because he was in too much pain to bend. I had to gently put some crushed ice on him, holding it there while he groaned but kept his hand entwined into my free hand for most of the night. He had a problem with peeing the next day.

I never felt so sorry for him in my life. We love each other deeply though, and it kind of hurts me to see him in such pain.

Samantha

(More nuts stories here)

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Hi Todd, I’ve been laid off for 8 years now. I know how you feel. Looks like you are getting some attention from the media. I hope it is bringing you some money.

If we are ever in the same city, maybe we can go out together sometime. I think you are good looking with no hair. I bet you have a good beard. You should grow it for the winter time.

Well, I better go. Talk to you later.

Debbie
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Hello, Todd!

I Was wondering if i could use some of your art for non profit, Non
commercial use Paintshop Pro Style Tags?

Especially your Pumpkin for a Halloween one but generally would be
awesome, you would be Copywrite mentioned like “© Oddtodd
http://www.oddtodd.com/” or any other way you wish! and I could send you
what I have created with it 🙂

Thanks so much for your time

Lene and Tony
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We headed down to the beach this past weekend for a last warm weather hurah, and
this is Max enjoying a sunny day on the deck. 🙂


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Hey OddTodd!

I own hatersworld.com… Just wanted to say thanks for the coolio funlinks mention!

I wanted to personally thank you for posting a link to our site on oddtodd.com! I was wondering if you had connections to any other websites or media outlets that you could blog about us on/ put us in contact with… If not it’s no problem at all! If there is anything we can do to help promote you just let me know!

Thanks,

Chris
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Hey todd, I decided to try to track down Mr. Deng, and I emailed his sister because his emails no longer work.. and I got a reply! Just wanted to let you know:

“Hi, yes, I am Deng’s sister. He has beening busy for his job for a long time. I will inform him about your miss to him.
Thanks,
Deng’s sister”

I swear this is legit, I got her email from one of Deng’s Diaries, you can even try to email her yourself: [email protected]

Looks like we may hear from him after all! If he writes you again be sure to post it on the website! (and maybe you should update that post at least saying hes still alive?)

Eric
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tOdd, I sure do miss your early morning bad inventions. I can’t be the only one feeling this way, can I?

Bird
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Troma at its best!

http://www.invasionofthebmovies.com/poultrygeist.html

Enjoy!
-Jason
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Send me an email [email protected] or send a letter to: Odd Todd PO Box 23133 – Brooklyn 11202

8

First says:

First

WTF?!?!?!?!?! says:

I HATE the Balls stories. Guy gets hit in the nuts. Hurts real bad. The End.

Anonymous says:

What are you talking about WTF!?!? They’re funny.

WTF?!?!?!?!?! says:

Spoken like a real woman. Probably a ball-crushing man-hating dyke too.

If you’ve EVER been hit in the balls, you know it’s no joke. If you actually are a man, have somebody kick you in the balls for me. Hard. Then write up a story and send it in.

I promise to read it- it will all be worth it for the satisfaction of knowing you got kicked in the balls.

How about we have a column for the Ladies- “Worst Menstrual Cramps I’ve Had”? Or Got Run Over By A Car Stories? Just saying…

The Great CaptainTaco says:

What if your girlfriend had the worst menstrual cramps ever and then ran over your balls with a car? That would spoil your day.

WTF?!?!?!?!?! says:

Exactly my point. Why would I want to read about it? It’s not exactly like there any unexpected plot twists to this saga.

Plot Point #1) Got hit in balls
Plot Point #2) Hurt like a motherfucker
Plot Point #3) The End

The only variation was that a few months ago, some guy named “Cory” had a story- which had more holes in it than Obama’s voting record AND personal history combined, incidentally- claiming to have gotten caught trying to boink his underage girlfriend by her parents, who proceeded to whack him in the nuts with… a brick. Like people have bricks sitting around in their house, just for that reason.

Rule #1 Of Dating: If you go to your new girlfriend’s house and her parents have bricks sitting around, get the hell out of there ASAP.

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