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This is the easiest thing in the world to make, and it impresses
people who don't know any better.  Plus it takes like two seconds.
Fresh mozzarella really makes this much much better.

Pasta Pesto

1 lb of pasta shells
1 box tiny genetically modified grape tomatoes
1 thing of Contadina pesto sauce.  (Only use this kind)
1 blob of fresh mozzarella cheese

Cook pasta according to directions on box. 

Cut tiny geneetically modified grape tomatoes into little pieces

Cut blob of fresh mozzarella cheese into smallish cubes.

Open package of pesto sauce.

Drain pasta -- don't rinse -- and put it back in the pot (unless
you're trying to impress people, in which case a bowl might be in
order).  Glop pesto sauce out of the container and onto the pasta.
Mix it up.  Add tomatoes and cheese and a couple of grinds of black
pepper.  Mix up some more.  Done!

Warning: The order is important.  You really don't want the mozzarella
to melt.  It will just stick to the bottom of the bowl that way.

Rathead, NY

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dear mr. oddtodd,

this recipe was passed onto me by a friend.  i have no clue where they obtained it.
 
 
1 lb boneless chicken breasts
1 bottle your favorite beer
1 c. texas pete hot wing sauce (or your favorite brand)
2 packages lipton fettuccine alfredo noodle mix (or comparable brand)
slice chicken into bite size pieces
put into frying pan
add 1/2 of the bottle of beer (drink remainder)
add 1 c. of hot sauce

cook over medium low heat until chicken thoroughly cooked
prepare alfredo noodles according to package directions, when done
add chicken and sauce to alfredo noodles -- it's good if you can avoid making the noodles too watery.

enjoy!

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Todd – I can’t believe you haven’t included the unemployed meal of choice –

doggie wraps!

Yummy and just a scosh pathetic.  Also, if you tell your Mom you had doggie wraps for dinner, she will send you money and a homemade meal.

Ingredients

Hot dogs

Cheese

Pillsbury croissant roles

Cut cheese into long strips.  Take hot dog and cut a slit lengthwise.  Insert cheese.  Open croissant roles tube -- carefully.  Unroll and separate unformed croissants.  They should look like little triangles.  Roll them around the cheese stuffed hot dogs.  Bake until the croissant is golden and the cheese is melty.

Good points – portable; goes well with tater tots; can serve as breakfast food in a pinch.

Bad points – see pathetic above.

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